This year is the second year I sadly witness graduation day posts in my Instagram. One by one, my friends have finally graduated in Master, but I'm still left behind. It should have been me in 2022, but unfortunately I am not. And as the year pass, it should have been me in 2023, but still, I stays in missing. My motivation level is often low, and it rarely reaches a high point. It all started, but I had so much hope at my first year of master. Delayed by countless delays, postponed by endless postponements, and eventually, I find myself lacking the motivation and ambition I once had. Hari tu dah feeling very high energetic to be back in track but maybe because of the family issue, and stay 2 weeks taking care of my mother in law made me can't reach my expectations and list. Semoga setiap pengorbanan dan kesabaran menjadi ladang pahala buatku.
Sometimes I wonder why, but maybe Allah had plan better for me, He knows the best time and year I finally graduated. Maybe with baby in my belly carrying my baby on the stage while my husband watching and waving at me on the stage.
Not just that, at this point I was thinking am I able to be a lecturer? Bila dah low motivation macam ni it is hard to me to set back and achieve my ambition. Lowest betul la right now. It has been so long I cry so much after solat, I nak graduate, I nak pensyarah tapi kenapa Allah duga macam-macam. I know it should be me myself that warm up my mind and body to be motivation, yes I question, but Why AKU MACAM NIII :((
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