Assalamualaikum. Speaking to almost thousand of followers here doesn't mean they all read my entry. Never mind but what matter this blog had stand still with me since 2015. It does knew my stories beginning and until know it waits me to say something in here. Sorry baby I only write when I feel it too. You are the one that should made as good listener.
There's a lot to write here, my heart is drowning by so many stories. I can't believe at my age 27 this year I have to faces with these burdens in my mind and heart. I couldn't find any way to skip or press any pause button. I know after all we are just a servant in this temporary world, to Allah we belong and cry over Him. Yes of course I did that.
Alhamdulillah i passed this one task as i been struggling it almost a year after the consistency of the night's date with Allah. But after that out of nowhere I accidentally drag someone into my circle of previous problem which I had no ideas. He came for helps which he helps a lot on calming my self down and after that he becomes a target victim to my next phase of new problem. It runs up too fast I lose the route. Everything is crazy! We know each other and we met for a reasons (thats what old friend meet to be), we exchange life's story and give motivational support to live also ideas to share.
Like I said to him before, 'you are a nice person to make as long-last friendship', but when now it walks insanely I have to command myself to shut down where and how it all started. I have to cause I might fallen in love with him bit by bit if this continuously happens. I have to take my words back which we are a human being, we create that boundaries and we also can breaks the boundaries that we built. You have your own traumatic love's story and I don't want it shadows your life now.
But sometimes I feel this so funny, lelaki pilihan ditolak keluarga, pilihan keluarga ditolak diri sendiri? kau nak apa ain shafiqah, hahaha. Maybe its back to my last line in the last paragraph up here or IDK.
